Mandy Schumaker

PERFORMANCE COACH, TRAINER AND SPEAKER

Goal

Stop Doing These 5 Things To Advance Your Goal

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To get what you want, stop doing what isn’t working…
Dennis Weaver

Too often when we talk about goals, or intentions, or New Year’s resolutions, we just add a lot of things to our “to do” list. It’s no wonder that so often we get off-track or overwhelmed with our “things to accomplish” lists…sometimes even our bucket lists feel overwhelming. I’m convinced it’s because people don’t take the time to look at what they might stop doing. This may partially be a cultural thing, that when we stop doing something-it’s a sign of failure, or that we’re giving up, or perhaps we can’t “handle everything”-which is supposed to be a badge of honor in our society.

But I really encourage you to take a look at what’s no longer working for you in your life or business and stop doing those things.

Here’s a list of 4 things I compiled that have made my list for this year. I actually left the 5th one blank for you to add your own!

1-Stop hanging around negative people, including negative clients. You know those people who take more energy from you than give you energy. You know who they are, and by distancing yourself from them, you can start to spend time with those people in your life with a positive outlook on things. Trust me, you’ll find much greater energy from them.

2-Stop complaining. And start focusing on what’s working in your life, and what your grateful for. Extreme gratitude brings more goodness into our lives. Complaining just brings more wrinkles to your face! Live life from an abundant versus a scarcity perspective.

3-Stop checking your mobile device every 10 seconds (or at least between the hours of 6 pm and 8 am). Spend the time you gain talking to your kids, your spouse, and your partner. Let your brain rest from all the information you’ve put into it all day. This constant obsession with your phone takes you out of the present moment, trust me; you really miss a lot along the way!

4-Stop worrying so much about what everyone else is achieving, your looks and what everyone else thinks of you. Really, none of it matters at all. What matters is what you are achieving what YOU want to achieve, that you feel good about how you look and what you think of yourself!

5-Stop __fill in the blank___ What’s the one thing you’d like to add to this list that you will stop doing in 2012?

I’d love to know what you add to the list! Feel free to drop me an e-mail atmandy@mandyschumaker.com and let me know!

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5 Proven Ways To Improve Your Happiness

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No one is in control of your happiness but you; therefore, you have the power to change anything about yourself or your life that you want to change.

– Barbara de Angelis

Many of us spend hundreds upon thousands of dollars every year on books, CD’s, seminars, coaches, teleseminars etc to figure out how to be happier in our lives. Interestingly, there’s been very little research to date on what actually makes us happy. There’s a lot on what makes us unhappy, depressed, miserable, but those are certainly not places we aspire to.

There has however, been recent data on the ceiling of achievement of material comfort-which is around $75,000. More money a year, after that amount, has very little effect on your happiness.

But according to a new research study from Stanford and Wharton, the way you spend your time can make HUGE difference on your happiness quotient. These researchers looked at 60 academic studies and came up with five guidelines that anyone can use to increase their happiness.

1-Who You Spend Time With Matters. The research shows that by spending our time with the “right people”, generally family, friends and romantic partners, will increase our overall general happiness. Finding the people in our lives that “give us energy”, not “suck out our energy” are the “right people”. The research also shows that a predictor of happiness is how much substantive conversation we have in our lives. Small talk can make people unhappy and often times our lives have a disproportionate amount of small talk in it.

2-Increase your socially connecting activities. Are you connecting often with friends and family? And while there are certainly benefits to social media and on-line groups, socially connecting activities also means physically getting out with other people who enjoy the same activities and hobbies that you do.

Volunteering and focusing on other people’s issues and challenges, can improve our level of happiness as well. Look for organizations that mean something to you and see where you can offer your gifts and strengths.

3-Take time to daydream. Research has shown the part of the brain responsible for pleasure can be activated just by thinking about something pleasant. For example, vacation planning is something some people enjoy more than the vacation itself. Memory is also important to happiness, because it takes a past event or experience and allows us to “expand” its worth into the future.

4-Be in the present moment. Focusing on the “here and now” slows down the perceived passage of time, allowing us to feel less rushed. One study showed that people who were asked to breath slowly, taking long and slow breaths (versus short quick ones) for five minutes, helped them feel there was more time available to get things done, and gave the perception that the days are longer.

Pay or barter with people to do the chores you dislike. Tasks that we choose to do and like make us happier than the obligatory tasks. If you can afford to hire someone to do the things around the house that you dislike i.e. cleaning the house, mowing the lawn, then do so, and take the time you “bought” to do something enjoyable. If you don’t have the money-see if you might barter or trade with someone, something you like to do for something you don’t like to do. Maybe child care for house cleaning, baking bread or cooking some meals for something else. Be creative.

5-How old you are effects the way you experience happiness. The younger generations tend to measure happiness by excitement, but the older generations tend to associate happiness with peacefulness. Younger people get more happiness from spending time with interesting new people, while older people get more enjoyment from spending time with close friends and family.

My hope is that some of these will inspire you to look at the way you think and spend your time and perhaps make some changes that will increase your happiness quotient!

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Are You Making A Real “Here And Now” Commitment?

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So, we’re nearly to the halfway point of the year 2011. How are you doing on those goals you set for yourself back at the beginning of the year? Hopefully you’ve reviewed them perhaps on a quarterly basis, or maybe even a monthly basis, to track how you are doing. Or has the day to day gotten in the way and you’ve not had a chance to look at them since writing them?

To move from goals and intentions on a sheet of paper to making a real, here-and-now commitment, requires extraordinary courage and determination. Taking consistent action is crucial. You can have all the beautiful goals and dreams in the world, but they will only come true if you are willing to make the commitments and take the actions necessary to make them come true.

The difference between wishful thinking and positive thinking is this: wishful thinking is hoping for something and waiting for it to happen, but positive thinking is expecting something and working for it to happen.

Here are 3 tips to get you back on track with your 2011 plans, goals, or intentions.

#1 Review the goals you wrote back in January
This sounds so basic, but you must spend some quiet time reviewing the goals you wrote nearly six months ago. If you aren’t clear where you are tracking with each of them, take the time to look at that. You can’t move forward if you don’t know where you currently are. Make the time to do this today.

#2 Are your goals big enough?
Make sure your goals are big enough. Often times our thinking gets stuck in a rut and when we create goals or visions, they are just “more of the same”. Ask yourself, what would your world look like if you were being the real you, the authentic you, and pursuing the work that is your true calling? What work would you be doing every day? Where would you be doing it? With whom? Where would you live? In what kind of house? The more clear and detailed you can be of your future, the more certain you are to take the actions now that will assure it becomes your reality.

#3 Stop looking for easy and start “doing” today
It’s our aversion to working against resistance that stops us from growing, learning, evolving and adapting. What’s the resistance you are working against? What’s the one step you can take today that will move you closer to your perfect future in your life or business?

“Unless commitment is made, there are only promises and hopes, but no plans” Peter Drucker

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Feeling Stuck? Five Tips To Get Yourself Unstuck And Back On Track

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It happens to all of us at varying times.  We get stuck.  We know what we “want” to be doing, or where we “should” be going, or what we “ought” to be achieving.  But something is holding us back between what we desire and where we are in our job, business, or life.  As a leadership coach, I often work with clients who are stuck. Stuck in their current job or position.  Stuck in a business they don’t find fun or fulfilling anymore. Perhaps they’ve gotten caught up in the details and have lost sight of their intended vision or outcome.  Or perhaps they are unable to focus on what they really want because they have a fear of the unknown, or a loss of confidence.  Often times they just feel plain overwhelmed and don’t know where to start and can’t make a decision.  Whatever the reason, it’s painful, frustrating and downright depressing to be stuck. 

If you are a leader or business owner, being stuck also has an impact on our employees and organizations.  New ideas, projects and innovation within our organizations are jeapordized.  Your direct reports feel frustrated that things are not moving forward and there is probably a loss of trust and respect.  Productivity and profitability are compromised and customers may start to lose interest and patience with your products and services.

Again, we all get stuck at different times of our lives but what’s most important is how we choose to move through what’s keeping us stuck.  After working over the years, with clients who have found themselves stuck in a job or business,  I have found the five following tips help get most people unstuck and moving toward their goal and vision.

1) Consider playing a bigger game.  Perhaps your goal is too small and you are bored, which if the case, will clearly not motivate you to take action and move forward.  Look at your vision or goal…and double it!

2) Perhaps your goal is too large and you need to play a smaller game.  If your goal is too big, you could easily get overwhelmed and stuck in a rut.  So either set a smaller goal, or set milestones along the way and target those.

3) Do the opposite. What might happen if you started doing the opposite of what you’ve been doing to help move yourself forward, or reach your goal?  Sometimes taking a 180 or even a 90 degree turn is what’s needed to help move you along.

4) Ask yourself:  Is this really the goal I want, or is this a “should” goal.  So often I ask my clients this question when they are stuck and many, many times it’s a “should” goal.  Not something that’s coming from your heart.  Fill in the blank and answer the question, “If I do _______________, am I doing it to make ME happy or just to make someone else happy?”

5) Identify your top five values.  This is a very helpful exercise in getting clear on what values in your life are most important to you.  Only then can you authentically move forward towards a goal or objective that clearly expresses your value(s).  Working with a coach or mentor is an excellent way to identify your value list, which helps create the cornerstones for any change, movement, goal or objective you hope to achieve.

I would really welcome your comments  on this subject.  If you’ve found a successful way in helping get yourself unstuck,  I would love to hear from you.  In the meantime, if any of this post resonates with you and you’d like to have some support on getting yourself unstuck,  please feel free to call me at 207-653-6977.

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